1. You’re probably the best friend I’ve ever had, even though you sometimes piss me off. But I’m not mad for long. We ARE swaggAH, and you are my twin. And we are one in the same, and I DO NOT know what I would have done without you last summer. Those times were some of my darkest. You taught me how to open up again, and I could look at life in a new way. A lot of laughs have come from how you’ve changed me.

2. I don’t know what happened to our friendship. I don’t know why we don’t talk. I don’t know why you don’t answer my texts and why you replaced me quite a while ago. I don’t know why you only talk to me when you want either a ride or school work help. And this whole thing almost broke me completely last summer, if you didn’t know. I really didn’t have any other friends and I was trying to hold onto our friendship. And things got weird. And you left me for him, like I was some trash on the road.

3. I’m glad I decided to take that class & that I didn’t really know anyone else in there, but I knew you were friends with numba oneee on this list. And I asked you to save me a seat. And we got close. And you’re ridiculous and awkward and make my life a lot brighter. And even though we “fight” over guys, it’s not even forreal. We’re just ridiculous like that, hahahaha. And it’s fun to pick on you, hahaha but not seriously.

4. It’s so weird how we became friends, but 2 outcasts + no one else to turn to + being basically thrown together with no other option = best frannnns <3 I’ve never had a friend quite like you. You do remind me of a friend from a few years back though. But you’re very forward and sometimes I don’t even understand you. I don’t know if you want to confide in people, (it’s your personal business).. and you have confided in me, but you can tell me stuff. It’s like you hint at things and then you get me worried. I’m here for you, and I know you’re here for me. We’re basically attached at the hip at school, even though we’ll never have classes together. And you always steal my bracelets and grab my wrist and drag me somewhere, hahaha. I feel like sometimes we talk ALL the time, then you just go MIA for a while and I don’t hear from you… That’s what I’m saying, I feel like you’re so mysterious, idk how to describe you. hahaha

5. We’re kinda like sisters now ?? Hahha, I feel like my freshman year, we barely knew eachother, but could talk. And honestly, you’re easy to talk to. And you’re honest, but not bitchy without reason. But we see eachother a bit now and it’s definitely interesting to shop and go on adventures with youu ! You make life fun, you’re always looking for something and someone new, hahaha. In a good way ! I really hope (& I think we will) have some classes together next yearr. And again, I’m here if you need someone to just listen to your problems. Because you’ve been there when I bitch on and on. And you don’t complain, haha. But I hope we chill a lot this year, because you’re a genuinely good person, and you make me a better person too ! :D and we’re always so serious&silly@thesametime

6. I feel like we got really close because of #4. We actually had another mutual friend on this list, (and now because of me, a few others on this list) but never really knew eachother. And I feel like we can sorta relate to eachother in a .. idk, weird way. But not bad weird. Like, I feel like I’ve known you longer. But I feel like you live in your own world. And I am totally okay with you talking about your specific interests, and I never complain. But if I want to talk about something (or really anything), I get short answers. I just don’t like hostility at all, I get defensive. I’m really sensitive, and I try not to be. But I feel like you’re just totally uninterested in what I have to say. So I have to be ridiculous to get you to laugh or talk to me, or to relate to you… or whatever. And I feel like you’re too on people’s cases. I don’t know, just. I don’t criticize people, but you criticize me, and other people. And it just bothers me. Maybe this post is so negative because of what recently happened. I’m hurt. And I actually did tell you (I usually don’t). And you hardly said anything. not even sorry. But we have a lot of inside jokes and fun memories though, that’s one thing that I know that we have :D

7. You don’t understand how grateful I am that you introduced me to this place. Even though we barely knew eachother, I asked you a question in 8th grade geometry about your dance studio. I was going through a reallyyy rough time where I was at, and I was really just upset. Even my parents could tell; that’s bad. But you told me about it, my parents called, and I took a class as soon as possible. Voila, there I was, some random chick in company, but aaaye. I’ve become a lot happier there, even before I was ‘in.’ I will still happier being in that environment than before. I had no one to talk to before. Even though there was a lot of drama because girls are dumb, and they aren’t very accepting sometimes, they came around. And I wouldn’t be where I am today, and things would be a lot different if it weren’t for you. I might have even quit dancing. And that’s something that I completely disregard doing, and it has been that way for a while.

8. I wish you didn’t live so far away. You were my only friend. You put up with the fact that a lot of people didn’t like me. You understood me. You listened to me. And honestly, I don’t think I realized this until now, but you inspire me to be a better person, even today. You unknowingly inspire who I am today and how I live. You are graceful and artistic and beautiful because of your true kindness and love of people. You gave me the courage (even though, at the time I was still scared) to just be okay with who I am and who I’m always going to be. Now, I can say, yeah, I’m not ‘popular’ or maybe I’ll have an opinion that you don’t share, but that’s OKAY. Because I’m me. And it broke my heart that you moved away. I still cry about it, a lot. And it happened so quickly. And that left me with really no friends. One sorta friend that developed into a best friendship and then crashed, which I already talked about ^^^^^. But, I miss you. I just want you here. I miss everything. Our sleepovers, our walks to starbucks. Our inside lingo. Playing that penguin thing, hahaha idr. And I always think; “what would she do if she were here?” or “I bet she’d be with me right now.” or when I drive by the turn-off for your old house, “I should walk over there now… oh wait.” or “she would totally be excited about this…” or “we’d have so much fun there!” I just don’t know. And I never will.

9. I know we’re not best friends, but I think of you as a good friend. And I wonder why we don’t hang out a lot. Idk, I try to text you .. ? hahah but we both are pretty good friends though, like if we were chilling with a group, we’d both be invited. idk, anyway. To what I wanted to say. I wanted to thank you again for knocking a little bit of sense into my head around New Year’s, I believe? I was pretty down on myself as usual, “I’m ugly” this and that… blah blah, the typical. But, I didn’t expect you to realize, or care. But you sent me this long group of messages on facebook. It was about happiness. And you definitely enlightened me. People have told me to think positively. But you taught me to open up a little bit and let my light shine through. Hahaha and it’s funny how you didn’t like me in middle school (everyone else didn’t as well). So yeah, from how you treated me (and the name you repeatedly called me), I didn’t like you because of that. But we can admit it now. I’m strong enough to be fine with haters. You’re fab, and let’s do random stuff this year, hahahah let’s get crazy!! ha NOT BAD CRAZY :D

10. Freshman year & last summer, we were really close. We hardly talk anymore. We’re both busy. Plus, this year you got your two new best friends, and you guys are tight. And I hardly know your world anymore, but I really do like hanging out with you. You are a sweet person, let that be shown. And I would sometimes stop by your locker & talk to you, but there were so many people always around, I was overwhelmed, hahah. But I miss how we used to be, scheduling and school and everything else is just against us. And we’re two different people, and we always have. But I miss you, and I always wonder how you’re doing. I miss just hanging out with you and being, just carefree I guess. Idk why I feel like that when I hang out with you though, hahaha.

OH & 11. I really, really liked you for basically a year. And you’re freaking oblivious. You KNEW. We ALL know it. You knew how I felt. Yet you can still be geniunely nice? I don’t understand you. I just wanted a chance. No one understood why I liked you. Apparently you’re “awkward.” But I am too. And secret’s out, I liked you. A LOT A LOT A LOT. You completely broke me, which broke a best friendship & kinda created a new one.

12- you’re a fucking idiot. I liked you because you were sweet, funny, smart & just kinda outgoing, but not too obnoxious. the good obnoxious, like around friends. and I would have told you how I felt, but ermmm my friends kinda jumped in.. and things got awkward. but I pretended that I didn’t care, so I’d joke about it to my friends to hide the embarssment and hurt. but I feel like you were just testing me to see what I’d say to you or what I’d do. nothing happened. I just don’t know anymore. I changed myself for you. not in a bad way. well, changing for a guy is bad, so yeah. just, I’d ALWAYS have to be on top of my game, I felt like I had to be perfect in everyway. be pretty, fashionable, nice, funny, smart (I tried even harder than usual), friendly, bold, outspoken, energetic, chill, strong, and just everything else that I thought you wanted. but I just didn’t measure up I guess, sorry. I got sooo TIRED (physical and emotionally, seriously) of trying to impress you… it was just bad. I wasn’t throwing myself at you, but in my own way, I just was kinda .. there and I hoped you would notice me. but I hope you’re happy. really.